: Whip Crack - away!
5th September 2012
had just sat down to write today's report when, suddenly,
an extract from Mozart's Rondo à
la Turk uninvitedly invaded the air:
iddle diddle iddle
iddle diddle diddle-um
in old speak: brrrrrng brrrrrng..........brrrrrng brrrrrng)
Hello, am I speaking to Mr Donald?
You might be; who is calling?
Mr Donald, do you own
your own home?
Why do you want to know?
[DS presses nuisance button]
"There must be some way out of here" said the joker to the thief,
Do not worry, Mr Donald, this is not
a sales call
"There's too much confusion",
I can't get no relief.
I'm not worried. Why are you
Businessmen, they drink my wine, plowmen dig my earth.
Mr Donald, we are conducting a market
and if you could just answer a few questions....
None of them along the line know what any of it is worth.
.... we can come and insulate your loft
"No reason to get excited", the thief he kindly spoke,
..... and cavity walls....
"There are many here among us who feel that life is but a joke,
.....and fix the problem you have with your computer....
But you and I, we've been through that,
.....after which we will invite you on an all expenses paid cruise
and this is not our fate.
....... followed by a stay in our wonderful resort in Florida
So let us not talk falsely now,
.....whilst getting you a refund on
your PPI insurance
the hour is getting late."
Mr Donald .....
All along the watchtower,
.....can you hear me, Mr Donald?
princes kept the view.
Mr Donald? Mr Donald?
While all the women came and went,
Mr Donald? There seems
to be some noise on the line.....
barefoot servants, too.
Mr Donald, can you hear me, Mr Donald?
Outside in the cold
Mr Donald, I can't hear you, Mr Donald
wildcat did growl.
Mr Donald, I can't hear you Mr Donald,
I can't ..............................
Two riders were approaching,
Mr Donald...................... Mr Donald ? ? ? ? ?
? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
the wind began
Hello ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
? ? ?
Along the Watchtower. The question is, which
version to play?
Dylan or Jimi
them both. Bob prefers Jimi. I prefer Bob, for
this purpose at least. Although Jimi does get
got the idea from Stephen B after my previous technique
using the Murder
on me. The only difference is that he plays Doris
Day then goes
and has a Sarsaparilla.
Click on the Doris link if you don't know why!
Click on the link even if you do. It's good
fun and wasted on nuisance callers!
then, where was I before I was so rudely interrupted?
Hn has mentioned wanting to visit the Langdales, or,
in particular, his namesake, ever
since we first met him but so far we had managed to dissuade him,
blaming weather conditions or tourists as the reason.
Today we had no such excuse.
three line whip but sadly only two, Mike and I, responded
proved to be a fine day. At times
warm and sunny, at times cold and blowy
Stan and Bryan otherwise engaged, we had
no experienced leader to guide us. Initially,
I thought we should take the east side of
Stickle Ghyll to Stickle Tarn before whipping
up North Rake but in the absence our two
guides, I did something I have not done
for a long time- I turned to Wainwright.
He mentioned an interesting sounding
alternative of going up to Harrison Stickle
via Pike Howe which he described as "a
Stickle and Pavey Ark from Pike Howe
as a route to Stickle Tarn rather than direct to the
wrote only peripherally. Furthermore, I was referring
to the 1958 edition. I was 11, just a whippersnapper,
when that was published. What could have changed
since? Would it now be a motorway? Or a largely
forgotten track? The map was inconclusive.
a Whippersnapper is not to be confused with
a Whipper Snipper which is, I believe,
Oz for a strimmer, as I am sure James will
National Trust car park at the Old Dungeon
Ghyll fortunately remains in the National
Trust unlike certain others in the Lake
District. It turned out that we had
all brought our NT cards so we could have
made some money selling parking for the
selling Mike's fine Linthwaite sausages
with which he prepared us for the exertions.
with Linthwaite sausages
o'Blisco from near the New Dungeon Ghyll Hotel
cracked the whip and off we set. The Pike Howe
route made it easy to find our way- plenty of stone
steps for us to climb (but not the horrible road to
hell as per BB1227).
we met, for the first time, a man from Southport who
had the Wainwright book in his pocket but seemingly
no map He had turned back from climbing Harrison
Stickle as he thought it too dangerous. We explained
the safe route that we were taking but he implied he
was giving up and returning to the valley.
lived up to the last five letter of his name regarding
the splendidness of the view from Pike Howe. Thereafter,
crossing over to Stickle Tarn, the path was indistinct
to non-existent, but there was no danger of getting
lost (or falling off).
our amazement, at the tarn we met the Southportian for
the second time. He must have descended at pace
and then climbed up the Stickle Ghyll route. He
was still totally confused as to which way to go so
we advised him to use the North Rake rather than any
of the more direct approaches and certainly not Jack's
Rake. He could have come with us but it was time
for a coffee break in the lee of a banking.
we heard the a strange sound. At first I thought
it a Whip-Poor-Will that was calling. No, not Bing
Crosby in his
Blue Heaven. It was a bird noise and turned out
to be just a rather large seagull singing enthusiastically
to his mate in their blue heaven.
Tarn from North Rake
over, we climbed North Rake to the top of Pavey Ark.
Stickle was next- important for John as it had been
named in his honour. At the shoulder before the
climb, we met four young men who had come up the direct
route and were taking a breather. After a short
chat with them, and seeing how fit they seemed, we deferred
to allow the youths to proceed ahead of us. Then
the red mist descended. The honour of the BOOTboys
had to be upheld so we tucked in behind them as they
ascended at a fast pace. As I had hoped, they
were so shocked at being pursued by such old men that
their spirits were totally deflated and they collapsed
in exhaustion half way up, thereby allowing us an unchallenged
route to the top. This enabled John to have an
unencumbered celebratory photograph taken atop his namesake.
Tarn from Harrison Stickle
over and the need to get out of the wind meant that
lunch, much later than Tonytime, was taken near the
top of Dungeon Ghyll, Mike tucking into a fine tart
with whipped cream.
pond near Pike o'Stickle
resuming, whom should we meet again but that Sefton Stroller.
Now he was confused as to which way to descend.
After explaining the options he set off down the
Ghyll and was never seen again.
asked if we had ever seen foxhounds out on the fells.
I told him of one visit to the valley when we had seen
them on the fells near Pike Howe. Today, no hounds.
The whippers-in must have had a day off.
panorama from Loft Crag
two W's under his belt already today, John was getting
mildly interested in knocking off Wainwrights so we
made the easy climb up Loft Crag.
with the Stone Age Axe
Mike discovered a stone age axe, an exciting find before
the exciting ascent of Pike o'Stickle, a fine view point.
Stickle and Loft Crag from Pike o'Stickle
the descent, we opted for the trek across the rather
boggy Martcrag Moor, the scene of Bryan's accident on
At first we had thought he had incurred whiplash
to be confused with Miss Whiplash, leader of the Corrective
Party who, in turn, ought not be confused with Miss
Whip Crack aka Doris Day, of whom, more later) but it
turned out to be broken ribs.
return down Mickleden
o'Stickle and Loft Crag from Mickleden
old fire place in the ODG
am not sure if Bryan would have been proud
or despairing of me to know that I
whipped out my compass to ensure we found
the route down Stake Gill to Mickleden,
the Cumbrian Way descent to the Langdale
Valley. Followed, of course, by the compulsory
celebratory pint at the ODG.
it seem little changed from the night we
were thrown out in forty years ago. This
time, we didn't trouble the landlord quite
as much, although we did admire the old
fireplace and the interesting carvings on
was Toby Wonky and in what way?
that evening, I was about to relate the day's experience
to Margaret but she me interrupted saying "What's
Excuse me a moment," I said.
Donald- I think there was a fault on the line.....
[DS presses nuisance button]
the Deadwood Stage
a-rollin' on over the plains
the curtains flappin'
and the driver slappin' the reins
5th September 2012
you will have gathered from the above, I get fed up with intrusive telephone callers trying
to sell things I don't want, often under the pretext
of a market survey, whether it be holidays, roof insulation or fixing a non-existent fault on my computer.
a spate of such unwelcome calls I tried a rather interesting way of dealing with the offender
by making him think he is now part of a murder
investigation. For a while at least. Provided
you are not easily offended, listen to The
and decide if this is a technique you might want to
is that I tried this on a caller who was probably from
the Indian subcontinent and had had the trick
played on him before. When I told him I was a
policemen investigating the murder of Mr Donald he said
he was with the FBI !
Along the Whip Crack is much more better!
Your Money About To Be Wasted?
website does not generally get involved with political
matters (although various opinions are often expressed
forcibly during our outings). However, when JHn
drew to my attention the campaign against the proposed
wind farm at Killington, I was moved to say something..
don't have a deep rooted objection to windmills as such
(as long as I can't see them from our house or anywhere
pretty) but I do consider them to be grossly inefficient
in terms of the return on energy expended in creating
them and in terms of their cost. When part of
that funding is coming out of my pocket and all other
tax payers through government subsidies, then I do get
annoyed. Consequently I have e-signed the petition.
you want to find out more, see Killington
climbed in feet:
Ark, Harrison Stickle
Crag, Pike o'Stickle
John Hn, Mike
routes are put online in gpx format which
should work with most mapping software. You can follow
our route in detail by downloading bb1228.
see which Wainwright top was visited on which BB outing
For the latest totals of the mileages and heights see: BB Log.
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