29th August 2013
have a story to tell. But today I can't tell it.
I have been waiting for the right opportunity,
the right outing but poor weather conditions
prevailed, delaying the telling. It will have
to wait for a better day. Instead
we (John, Stan, Tony and I) needed to find a route that
stayed below the cloud line.
passes to the fore, we took the 555 to Grasmere, educating
one young Indian boy then two German youths en-route.
At least they said they were German but when,
as I prepared to alight, I
said to them "Jetzt müssen wir
aus dem Bus absteigen", they
gave me a puzzled look. Perhaps they had not my Englisher
absteiged, the plan was to climb to Alcock Tarn and,
if the weather permitted, continue to Heron Crag. We
avoided the temptation of starting with a swifty at
The Swan, the pub that Wordsworth
does not know the famous Swan?
was damp and sweaty as we climbed to the tarn which
was much overgrown with reed compared with previous
visits. It no longer gave the appearance of an
infinity pool. It's a bit of a paradox really-
infinity has ended.
high in bracken
weather (and Tony's feet} didn't inspire an upward climb
so we dropped down (isn't the bracken huge this year?)
to the coffin route to Rydal Hall
where we saw sights that had previously escaped us,
including the gardens and the waterfall with its 17th
century viewing hut.
with fish fountain
century falls viewing hut
we made our way into a rather busy Ambleside. I
thought that by fuelling the lads with Lakeland Ice
Cream cornets we would be able to make rapid progress
but, instead, it seemed to transform them into girlies,
stopping to gaze in every shop window.
the metamorphosis had been pointed out, they reverted
we encountered a man who fashioned unusual walking sticks
from wood. Stan feigned interest but I think he
was picking brain with the objective of making one himself!
from Jenkin Crag
Crag is a fine viewpoint from which to view Windermere.
Here we held a brief discussion about the possibility of
tackling Wansfell. The clag had lifted on the
lower fells although the Coniston range was still covered.
The decider was that Tony's feet were still hurting him badly.
We debated the merits of different
types of orthopaedic insoles and agreed that we would
simply head along the bridle path to High Skeghyll and
down to the Lowwood Hotel.
fine set of horns
way down, he announced that he had realised why his feet were
hurting. It was nothing to do with his insoles.
It was the fact that he had not noticed that his laces had come undone,
leaving his foot flapping around in the boot.
eventually reached the Lowwood where we ordered four pints
of the only beer they had, some obscure brew of which
we had never heard. We each took a sip and grimaced.
“Does this taste all right to you?” asked Stan.
“No,” we all agreed. As, to be fair, so did
the barman who immediately spat it out.. As did his manager. Given
was no alternative, we took a refund of money and departed
to wait for an earlier than planned bus in order to
put things right in Kendal.
the bus, a debate ensued as to where to go and how to
get there. We agreed on the historic Ring o'Bells but
disagreed on how best to travel. What followed
could have been a scene out of Top Gear. We would
alight at Kendal bus station but John and Tony would go by car whilst Stan and I decided it would be quicker
on foot. Losing team buys the beer.
was pretty confident of victory until we saw them walking
in the same directions as us. I had thought John's
car was in the multi-story car park so they would have
three floors and a ticket machine to negotiate before
needing to drive half way round town. He wasn't.
He was parked by the river. This meant he
could drive straight off and had little more distance
to travel than we did.
a challenge is a challenge. Stan
and I hared off up Gulfs Road and, in a ridiculously
fast time and some degree of sweat, arrived at the pub
door convinced of our success,
window, Ring o' Bells
our horror (many folk must have had this experience)
we saw Tony propping up the bar. We were distraught
until we realised that John was not with him. He
was still parking his car. Tony argued that first
to be there was the winner. We argued that it
was a team event and the full team had to be present
which meant that we had won. John eventually entered
at which point we realised that continuing the argument
was simply delaying service. We agreed that the
rule should be 4 points for first (Tony), three for
second (Stan), two for third (me) and one for fourth
(John) making the result five all. Honours even, the
serious business could start.
Tony showed us the etching on the window in the back
engaged in conversation with a gentleman whose mild
natured views and, to a lesser extent, his appearance,
put me in mind of a much missed BOOTboy
who now resides somewhat to the north of York.
debated how the world might be radically improved, we
departed, taking our various ways home. As I walked
along the darkening country lane to Natland, I noticed a
car approaching. On seeing me, the driver brought
the car to a halt and started to wind down the window.
two youths of dubious intent therein, I approached the
car and said:
"Listen, before you utter a word, let me
ask you one question. Have you heard of Jack Reacher?"
what?" came the reply.
I explained, "All I will say is
that if either of you so
much as steps out of the car, one of you will be dead
and the other seriously hospitalised. Do you understand?"
sorry. All we wanted to know was could you direct
us to the Leisure Centre?"
yes, son, keep on going to the roundabout then turn
there you have it. What started off with Alcock
has finished with a load of old Bull!
29th August 2013
week we showed this picture of Philip pointing
down the (Howgill) Langdale valley and invited
captions to be submitted.
am delighted to report that there has been
a massive response and those entries that
are publishable are shown below:
put your left arm in, your right arm out, you do the
and you turn about.
I could reach that bridge with a 5 iron.
has happened to my yo-yo?
- Don't you just love
the great small of Brut
help please. It is difficult doing the cha-cha-cha without
distract them with your right hand, then use your left
hand to pick their pocket.
is where I raised my rod and the waters parted
- Stardate 20130822.48:
Down there looks like a good place for lunch, Tony - don't you
the winner is John S with the erudite:
- Yonder would I would wish to
boldly go, had I not split my infinitive"
done, John. A magnificent (lie) prize is on its
way to you.
29th August 2013
climbed in feet:
(Memory Map / OS)
Tarn, Jenkin Crag
Don, John Hn, Stan, Tony
routes are put online in gpx format which
should work with most mapping software. You can follow
our route in detail by downloading bb1329 .
discover which Wainwright top was visited on which BB outing
- although it may not be quite up to date - see: Which
For the latest totals of the mileages and heights (ditto) see: BB Log.
have been gleaned from many sources although mostly
from me! Likewise written comment. Unless stated
otherwise, please feel free to download the material
if you wish.
A reference back to this website
would be appreciated but not essential.
.If I have
failed to acknowledge properly the source or infringed
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. Please let me
know and I will do my best to put things right.
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