Introducing the B.L.I.M.P. Code  

19th September 2012

What an odd-ball start to the day.  Stan had planned a route and brought the appropriate map for a tour round the Arnside area.  I had planned a route and brought the appropriate map for Place Fell, overlooking Ullswater.  So what do we do?  Visit Longsleddale and associated passes, for which we had no map other than Stan's cognitive recall.

How was I going to write this up, having had no advance warning to allow preparatory work?

It was one of the best mornings for a long time.  Unexpectedly, half way up the valley, we found the road blocked by hounds.  The local hunt was having a meet.  No Hooray Henrys on horseback here- real huntsmen who follow the hounds on foot over some pretty tricky terrain.

We parked at Sadgill to discover that it was much colder than I had anticipated.  As we marched up the long and relentlessly climbing trail, an idea was forming in my mind, inspired by something my big brother, Alan, had said to me about reducing the time and effort in writing these BOOTboys reports.  He suggested a semi-automated system that allows the content to be determined through using a simple set of numbers.

Maybe it was because of me giving this more thought than I should have done, Tony, who was loyally keeping me company, and I lost contact with Stan and James who were haring up the valley's unyielding ascent.  On reaching the watershed junction where left takes you up Harter Fell and straight on leads you down the Gatesgarth Pass, we had no idea which way they had gone. I recalled Stan mentioning Harter Fell so almost set off in that direction.  Quizzing the odd walker who chanced by helped little until a couple confirmed that our two companions had actually taken the downward route and were some five minutes ahead.

Looking down to Haweswater

Given such frustration, the plan of how to simplify matters started to crystallise.

B.L.I.M.P  was about to be born; a code, which has next to nothing to do with the legendary old Colonel Blimp (although he will do fine for a logo)..

The description of any excursion could now be reduced to a short series of numbers grouped in clusters of digits, each digit ranging from 0 to 9 according to the circumstances.  A mathematician's delight!

We dropped down to Mardale Head to meet up with our companions.  I wasn't sure which way Stan planned to take us from here, I thought possibly over the Corpse Road but had I paid greater attention to what he had been saying earlier (and had some months ago described as a route we should do one day) I would have realised he was fulfilling his wish to do the Three Pass Round.

Lunch, bang on Tonoony time, gave me further opportunity to develop BLIMP.

There would be four sets of numbers, which for convenience I will label as for reasons that will become apparent.  Each number, dependant on its position within the set, would correspond to a relevant clause or phrase to form, when combined in the designated order, a sentence that describes, with some degree of (in)accuracy, the activity allegedly undertaken.

A further advantage of BLIMP dawned on me as we passed by some old mine workings and leapt a stream in order to join the main Nan Bield pass ascent.  The great beauty of this system is that works equally well on days when it is not possible, due to adverse circumstances like weather or hangovers, to undertake a normal expedition.  That fact can be masked by producing a hypothetical report using a random number generator.

After Small Water Tarn was reached and its outlet stream leapt, Tony was examining a prehistoric(?) shepherd's shelter whilst in my mind the modal structure was forming well.  I realised that there was a very simple way to determine which set of words should be used in what order.

All you need is a pack of cards with faces removed and 10 used as zero; one card from each suit  then being randomly selected in turn.

At the top of the pass, where we had a break on the unsheltered side of the Nan Bield shelter, I had all the wording sorted out and could demonstrate that, for example, the series 4921 is shorthand for a report saying:

Could anything be truer?  Or more relevant?

In weather now turning variable with short bouts of  dampness, Stan again took me by surprise when, rather than head down to Kentmere as I had presumed, he led us up towards the summit of Harter Fell.  To his credit, we had a superb view of the full arc of a rainbow.  

Haweswater Rainbow

Stan then further surprised me by electing not to take in the summit but chose to traverse on what he called "The Race Route" towards Kentmere Pike.

I realised I would now have to redraw the cards in order to produce today's report more accurately.  The result was:

 2 ,  0 ,  4 , 7      9 ,  6 ,  6 , 2

Which translates into:

On a morning when all companions were lethargic, a rucksack full of Gregg's pasties effectively eliminated all possibility of determining the moment when the summit was achieved.

When considering our specific goals, it should be remembered that the state of utter, complete exhaustion consistently overrode any thought of the ascent of the near vertical slope of Blackpool Tower.

Which seemed succinct and relatively accurate.  Purists might wish to convert the mention of the Tower into something more relevant to the walk but, once again, as we descended, we could see the Tower.

Looking south over Windermere, Blackpool Tower just visible

All this thinking had, for the second time, allowed Stan and James to escape Tony and me.  We knew that they would wait for us somewhere and correctly guessed that it would be by the wall below Shipman Knotts.  A cunning plan developed.  At Tony's suggestion, we took a hidden line rather more to the west and consequently reached the Sadgill Pass (or whatever it is called- the maps are silent on this topic) ahead of them.

This gave me the opportunity to randomly generate next week's report: 3280 1854, i.e.:

As I have mentioned in earlier reports, the mission specific objective was compromised by the strange reluctance to accept the time at which Tony insists on stopping for lunch

It can easily be demonstrated that a great struggle though steep rocky terrain, once again, led to an effect not dissimilar to my production of an old age pensioner's travel card.

Oh, sorry, I forgot to give you the full coding.  See The BLIMP Code Reference Manual shown below and commit it to memory. Please note that this is the last time that translation is being provided.  In future, readers will be expected to understand the description without the need for words.  I look forward to productive use of the hours that will thereby be saved.

Don, 19th September 2012

PS  You may find many more applications to which BLIMP can easily be adapted.  Do feel free to adapt the code as you think fit for your purposes.  There is no need to check back with me for consent.

The BLIMP Code Reference Manual

STATISTICS:

BOOTboys routes are put online in gpx format which should work with most mapping software. You can follow our route in detail by downloading bb1230.

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