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BB2630 : In Praise of Calisthenics
Wednesday
23rd 2026
It
was when I was wanting to buy a new pair
of trousers that the realisation set in.
My girth had expanded. I refused to
capitulate to the extra two inches my tape
message demanded. Something had to
be done. I turned to Uncle Google
for advice and he referred the problem to
his pal Gemini. They started talking
about something called calisthenics which
apparently means workouts without the need
to go to the gym.
I
told them about BOOTboy
walks and they were impressed. Cheekily,
I asked if it would be ok to have pie &
chips plus a couple of pints afterwards.
To my amazement, they considered the
effort expanded on such outings was sufficient
and gave me the green light. Things
were looking up.
Today
was looking up also and rather sooner so
than expected. To avoid the expected
heavy rain we (TV Mike, Robert and Robin
(plus Holly, of course)) delayed our start
and reduced the anticipated distance. We
needn’t have bothered- it was glorious sunshine.
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Our
start point was on the back road between
the Swan Hotel and the Newby Bridge train
halt. Indeed, a train obliged with
a steam-past just as were about to set off.
Oh, standing on the bridge being enveloped
in smoke and steam knocked nearly 70 years
off me.
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After
that excitement we climbed the steep path
up Waterside Knott, firstly to seek out
the viewpoint and then to visit Finsthwaite
Tower.
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I
can’t remember the date of my last visit,
nor can Uncle Google find it, but I do recall
the tower being in a rather sad condition.
That must have been before 2017 as
that was when its magnificent restoration
commenced.
The
tower is a summerhouse and with a memorial:
that was
Erected to honor the officers,
seamen and marines of the
Royal Navy
whose matchless conduct and irresistible
valour
decisively defeated the fleets
of France, Spain and Holland
and preserved
and protected Liberty and Commerce 1799”
The
Folly Flaneuse
tells the story owed to those who no longer
can speak to tell it for them.
Dropping
down on the other side was a revelation.
I had not realised that it would provide
such a superb view over Windermere to the
fells beyond.
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Our
next objective was to find the path that
would enable us to reach High Dam from the
east. However, en-route we came across
the Bobbin Mill which was closed but its
outside bench table was too inviting to
pass. As it had been a late start,
lunch was calling and we took advantage
of the facilities kindly provided.
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The
path to High Dam was perhaps a little controversial
in terms of access permission but clearly
others had been before us. This led
us up through woodland to reach the track
that circumnavigates the tarn. Jogging
towards us was a couple not exactly in their
first flush of youth but moving athletically.
I’m sure I know that face, I said
to myself as they sped by. He
looked like a man who could get a job at
Kendal ASDA as a reacher!
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Alongside
the path were some intriguing mushrooms
which had unfortunate properties. Somehow
they poisoned my camera so I have no photos
of any quality of the lake, its dam or its
industrial features. Indeed the wretched
thing didn’t start working again until we
came across a second crop of the magic mushrooms
who put things right. Weird.
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The
path then leads down through
the woods, alongside a stream
until it reaches Finsthwaite
with its remarkable church and
the 1771 grave of the Cumbrian
Princess, Prince Charlie's alleged
daughter:
CLEMENTINA
JOHANNES
SOBIESKY DOUGLASS,
of WATERSIDE,
BURIED
16th OF MAY 1771
BEHOLD
THY KING COMETH
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The
final stretch was the long, long green area
between two woods then down to the railway
where again we were treated to a display
of steam, this time from an engine named
Princess. I don’t understand the attraction
of riding in an ancient carriage even if
it is pulled by a proper locomotive. Nor
did some of the passengers, as they seemed
more interested in their phones than the
scenery. The real place to be is outside,
watching and being immersed in the sound
and emissions. I suppose it’s even
better riding the footplate but I have never
achieved that.
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After
all the excitement we ended up, surprise,
surprise, at the Hare & Hounds at Levens.
This brought to mind the calisthenics
advice I had received that pie and chips
plus a couple of pints would have been earned
and therefore permitted. As we had
already had lunch I reckoned that meant
that three pints without food would be acceptable.
In fact, I only had one and a half
which must mean that I am now well on the
way to not needing to go up that trouser
waist size. Result!
Don,
3rd September 2026
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